Building Your Interpersonal Relationship Skills:
Interpersonal relationships amongst humans is one of the major challenge threatening human coexistence. Lack of human interpersonal skills and the ability to accept everyone for who they are, and relate with them based on their personality traits is one of the main reasons for so many breakdown in communication amongst humans, and consequently makes relationships become boisterous.
However our temperament diversities could also be another major reasons why humans have become intolerant of one another. Every human being will often yield to the influence and control of their temperament on the way they do things. These differences in traits and behaviours courtesy of the temperament we’re born with, may not be appealing to someone who believes that their lifestyle is the best, without realizing that everyone is distinct, and we all pander, perhaps unknowingly to the influence of our primary and secondary temperament on us.
Another major reason why there may be breakdown in our interpersonal relationships, could also be as a result of the temperament weaknesses. Have you ever wondered why some persons after few days of knowing someone or after a very short period of relating with a particular person, they’ll begin to experience some serious conflicts, confrontations which may eventually bastardize their relationship?
Some temperament categories have a better interpersonal relationship qualities than others. While some temperaments are very domineering and egocentric, which could count for their weaknesses, others are more complementary and condescending. For some temperaments, because of some inconsistencies in their traits and lifestyles, which is necessary for building and maintaining a cordial relationship. This inconsistencies no doubt often hinders them from having a peaceful and long lasting interpersonal relationship.
Our temperament diversities plays a major role in influencing how we relate with others. And to what extent we’ll succeed in our relationship with others will most likely be determined by our temperament which controls our personality traits.
When it’s got to do with interpersonal relationships, cholerics have the least or very poor human interpersonal skills. For they’re highly domineering, egocentric and high-handed. They often like to lord their opinions on others, and they’ll not hesitate to ride roughshod over those who does not agree or pander to their opinions and, or decisions. Their highly aggressive, confrontational and canterkerous nature often makes them unable to relate well with people or maintain a longtime relationship.
Similarly, the weaknesses of other temperaments could also be a major factor that often militates against good interpersonal relationships.
For a typical sanguine, who appears to be very friendly and warm, but his lack of consistency, commitment and also seriousness about anything, which often makes them take almost everything for granted, prevents them for keeping or maintaining a longtime relationship. Sometimes, their quick and explosive anger whenever their feeling is undermined is also another factor.
No other temperament can be as impulsive and spontaneous as typical sanguines. Since his feelings rather than reasoning more often than not predominates his thoughts, and also determines his actions, he would’ve probably offended you either by verbal or physical abuse before he’ll realize that he overreacted or acted unintelligently.
Melancholies and phlegmatics who are obviously introverts, have got the best interpersonal relationship skills and qualities. Eventhough they’re not outgoing or people-oriented, and may also appear unfriendly and hostile. A closer look at them or perhaps an initial interaction, actually proves them otherwise.
However, phlegmatics are the most congenial, yielding and easygoing of all the temperaments. Eventhough they’re more often dominated and subdued in their relationship because of their calm, quiet, gentle and very peaceful nature. They are rarely aggressive, confrontational and may be antagonistic. An attitude which makes them easily likeable.
For melancholies, they’re the most loyal and dependable partners. But not until they’re sure of your sincerity and commitment to them. They will stick with you no matter the situation or circumstances, as long as you’ve proven yourself worthy enough to be relied upon. Their conscientious traits and lifestyle do not allow them to disappoint you when you’re counting on them. However, their perceptions, which is basically as a result of their feelings and emotions, moodiness and self-centredness, could be a major hindrance to maintaining a peaceful and longtime relationship.
How Do We Relate Perfectly With Everyone Irrespective of Their Temperament?
Having considered the fact that our temperaments have a major influence on our personality traits, and also determines to a large extent how successful we’ll be in our relationship with others. Some temperaments may possess some natural qualities that’ll enable them succeed in interpersonal relationship with others, the major weaknesses of other temperaments may be a major hindrance to having a peaceful and long lasting relationship.
But if you want to relate perfectly with anyone regardless of their temperament. You must first and foremost realize that every human being is distinct and has got a unique lifestyle that’s peculiar to them courtesy of their temperament. You must realize that, and let it sink into your faculty. So you don’t expect that everyone will behave or do things the way you do.
Secondly, you must understudy and know the temperament of everyone you relate with, which clearly control and Influences the way they do things. Having a very clear understanding of everyone’s temperament, will enable you to know the inherent strengths and weaknesses that are embedded in such temperament, and how best to relate with them.
Thirdly, having known and also had an understanding of different types of temperaments plus their weaknesses and strengths, the next thing is learn how to manage or deal with their weaknesses, while building on their strengths. Being tolerant of each other is basically one way every human being could be able to relate cordially with one another. But it’s quite very unfortunate that most persons are so intolerant of others because of their temperament weaknesses. The reason for this is not far-fetched. Our natural selfishness or self-centeredness is obviously the main reason. But if you want to build a better relationship with others, you must kill self-love, and realize that the other person has got weaknesses the same way you do.
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